Birkdale Better Than Formby for MILF’s

A typical Birkdale mum.

A typical Birkdale mum. In a surprise change of fortune, Birkdale has topped this year’s Southport & District MILF league table. Residents of Formby, whose MILF’s had topped the league for a record breaking six consecutive years, are said to be bitterly disappointed. “I’m not surprised though, to be honest,” One Formby More...

by admin | Published 2 years ago
bmw disabled parking
By admin On Friday, June 27th, 2014

BMW Drivers in Protest at Lack of Disabled Parking Spaces

Readers of BMW Today magazine have sent petitions to councils and major supermarket chains today, complaining about the ‘disgraceful’ lack of disabled parking bays. Their major concern was that, whenever More...

scouse eyebrow syndrome
By admin On Saturday, June 21st, 2014

Sufferers of ‘Scouse Eyebrow Syndrome’ Now Eligible for Free NHS Treatment

Jeremy Hunt, the Secretary of State for Health, announced today that people suffering from the debilitating Scouse Eyebrow Syndrome (SEBS) will be able to receive free treatment on the NHS. There are thought to More...

A man holding tea- and coffee-filled mugs over an office table
By admin On Thursday, June 19th, 2014

Idiots Who Use The Same Spoon for Tea and Coffee to be ‘Named and Shamed’

People who don’t use separate spoons when making tea and coffee are to be ‘named and shamed’ under new Government guidelines. “Tea is a vital lubricant to the British economy.” Minister, More...

The 'half thong'.
By admin On Thursday, June 12th, 2014

Masculinity Dead

The ‘half thong’. The world went into mourning today, as masculinity took its last slow, shallow breath and passed into history. An official verdict of death by embarrassment has been recorded. Before More...

Got a light mate?
By admin On Thursday, May 29th, 2014

Southport Man Injured Trying to Light Electronic Cigarette

Got a light mate? There are renewed calls for an outright ban on electronic cigarettes today, as news emerged that a Southport man was injured whilst trying to light one on his gas hob. Apparently, Kevin Rimmer, More...

southport brothel
By admin On Wednesday, May 28th, 2014

Southport Brothel Now Offering Clubcard Points

Southport’s favourite brothel, Blue, has teamed up with a leading supermarket chain to offer clubcard points on every transaction. Now, while patrons wait to be seen, they can peruse a full menu, including More...

She must have heard the ice cream van.
By admin On Friday, May 16th, 2014

Southport Puzzled by Mystery ‘Running Woman’

She must have heard the ice cream van. America has Sasquatch, Scotland has the Loch Ness Monster. Now Southport has its very own mystery. Over the last few weeks reports have been coming to us from confused locals More...

Nothing to see here...
By admin On Wednesday, May 14th, 2014

Ainsdale Birdwatching Society Evening Events ‘Not Dogging’

Nothing to see here… The head of Ainsdale Birdwatching Society, Shirley Knott, has released a public statement today assuring local residents that their activities absolutely do not include a bit of back seat More...