Published On: Fri, May 23rd, 2014

Southport Gets Apology For Cremation of Onion Farmer

Onions.

Onions.

Southport Crematorium have issued an apology for the awful smell of onions hovering over Southport today.

Apparently a small dignified service was carried out for local onion farmer, Brian Eyre.

“He loved his onions,” Brian’s grieving widow told us earlier. “So much so that he insisted that his casket be filled with them when he popped his clogs.”

“Everyone loved my Brian. You could tell by the people that came to the service. They were all crying their eyes out.”

“If Brian was still with us, he would have loved the smell of Southport today.”

 

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