Published On: Sun, Jan 26th, 2014

Face of Will.i.am Appears on Turnip

will-i-am

Not the actual turnip.

Ron Hesketh, 83, a keen gardener from Banks, found himself at the center of an international media storm this week, after growing a turnip with an uncanny resemblance to the American rapper, singer, songwriter, entrepreneur, voice actor, actor, DJ, record producer, philanthropist, talent show judge and olympic torch bearing superstar, will.i.am.

“I was just digging up my latest crop of turnips,” Hesketh told us, “And there it was. One that looked exactly like will.i.am.”

“I’ve been a big fan ever since he started saying dope all the time on the telly. We smoked a lot of dope in the 60′s. Though to be honest, I prefer Dre and Snoop.”

Unfortunately, we are unable to show you a photograph of the turnip. Apparently, the batteries had run out on Hesketh’s camera and his wife Ethel put the turnip into a stew last Thursday.

“She said it looked nothing like him and we had to eat it while it was fresh.” Hesketh explained. “I told her it was too fresh to eat but she didn’t understand. She isn’t down with it like me.”

“I did grow a carrot in ’92 that even Ethel said looked a bit like Rick Astley in the right light, though.”

Hesketh has warned the thousands of people making pilgrimages to his allotment, the site of the turnip’s appearance, that he will be closing it down soon.

“The doctor said I shouldn’t be driving with my eyesight.” He admitted sadly, “So if you want to come down for a miraculous infusion of cool, you’d better get a move on.”

 

 

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