LOCAL NEWS FOR LOCAL PEOPLE
Greta Thunberg en route to liberate Southport from occupation of Sefton Council
In a dramatic escalation of her international activism, pint-sized climate zealot and professional know-it-all Greta Thunberg has launched a daring crusade across the North...
Study explains why people from Southport are so incredibly sexy
The reason why Sandgrounders naturally exude an aura of effortless attractiveness has been an unexplained mystery in the scientific community for many years. Until...
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Southport brothel now offering Clubcard points
Southport's favourite brothel, Blue, has teamed up with a leading supermarket chain to offer clubcard points on every transaction.
Now, while patrons wait to be...
Double-Size Aldi Will Still Only Have One Till Open
Aldi have confirmed today that, despite spending millions doubling the size of their store in Kew, Southport, there will still only be one till...
Nine and a half reasons why Southport isn’t as shit as you think it is
From it's classy Victorian heyday, barely clinging on to mini Blackpool status in the late 20th century and on to to its present day...
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Formby signs free trade deal with Germany
While the British Government's talks with the EU over post-Brexit trade seem to have reached an impasse, Formby has already concluded a tariff-free deal...
Kew set for Britain’s First Bi-Directional Roundabout
Kew roundabout in Southport is to become the first bi-directional traffic island in Britain.
The two-way roundabout system is set to be rolled out across...
Southport puzzled by mystery ‘Running Woman’
America has Sasquatch, Scotland has the Loch Ness Monster. Now Southport has its very own mystery.
Over the last few weeks reports have been coming...
