LOCAL NEWS FOR LOCAL PEOPLE

Sefton Council workers defeat Pennywise the clown

Quick-thinking highway maintenance workers have guaranteed that residents of Botanic Road in Southport can sleep soundly tonight by blocking off drains with tarmac. We understand...

Screen stolen from Southport’s new open air cinema

Southport's latest entertainment destination, a beachside open air cinema, suffered a 'devastating' blow today, as thieves made off with the screen before the first...
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Marine Lake sold to American billionaire

News has reached us this morning that an American businessman has had a bid of £32million accepted for the Marine Lake Sefton Council has been...

Southport to Blackpool bridge facing fresh delays

Plans to begin work on the long-awaited Southport–Blackpool bridge have been thrown into doubt after concerns were raised about an influx of unruly partygoers. The...

Ainsdale Birdwatching Society evening events ‘not dogging’

The head of Ainsdale Birdwatching Society, Shirley Knott, has released a public statement today assuring local residents that their activities absolutely do not include...

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Local witch doctor now statistically safer than Southport Hospital

According to statistics released by public health researchers this week, a patient is now 3.82% less likely to die unexpectedly from treatment by popular...

Nothing on Masterchef beats soup and crisps from Southport’s old swimming baths

Masterchef may have been on the telly for almost thirty years, but they've been pretty much wasting their time, according to people of a...

Southport town centre to be relocated to Meols Cop

The Southport Business Improvement District team have decided upon a plan which will instantly solve all of the problems of Southport town centre. It has...

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