LOCAL NEWS FOR LOCAL PEOPLE
Lord Street springs leak
Anger is building among Southport residents this week as an apparent burst pipe on the town’s main shopping street continues to send several jets...
Nan horrified at being offered quesadillas on trip to Southport Market for new slippers
Local grandmother Elsie Rimmer, 84, has been getting a new pair of furry slippers from Southport Market every year since 1958.
Despite not getting out...
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Woollybacks gain protected minority status
After many years of being marginalised and ridiculed by scousers, people from Southport and other areas surrounding Liverpool have finally been recognised as a minority group...
Angus Young of AC/DC forced to wear long trousers
It is a little known fact that Angus Young, one of the founders of the Australian rock band AC/DC, has been buying his school...
Nine and a half reasons why Southport isn’t as shit as you think it is
From it's classy Victorian heyday, barely clinging on to mini Blackpool status in the late 20th century and on to to its present day...
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Southport town centre to be relocated to Meols Cop
The Southport Business Improvement District team have decided upon a plan which will instantly solve all of the problems of Southport town centre.
It has...
Southport kid banking on fake scouse accent to make it through school without a fight
Southport year 9 student, Oliver Wenthropp, has successfully managed to avoid fisticuffs for the first three years of high school, it has emerged.
"When I...
Local witch doctor now statistically safer than Southport Hospital
According to statistics released by public health researchers this week, a patient is now 3.82% less likely to die unexpectedly from treatment by popular...
