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Southport Kid Banking on Fake Scouse Accent to Make it Through...

Southport year 9 student, Oliver Wenthropp, has successfully managed to avoid fisticuffs for the first three years of high school, it has emerged. "When I...

Sufferers of ‘Scouse Eyebrow Syndrome’ Now Eligible for Free NHS Treatment

Jeremy Hunt, the Secretary of State for Health, announced today that people suffering from the debilitating Scouse Eyebrow Syndrome (SEBS) will be able to...

Merseyside Police in Huge Operation Against Suspected Scousers

Over 400 police officers took part in early morning raids today, on around 40 Merseyside properties suspected of containing scousers. We spoke to Chief Constable...

93% of Criminals in Liverpool Have Southport Accents

In 93% of muggings, burglaries and armed robberies committed in Liverpool, the perpetrator is reported to have had a Southport accent it has emerged. Merseyside...

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