The world went into mourning today, as masculinity took its last slow, shallow breath and passed into history.
An official verdict of death by embarrassment has been recorded.
Before shuffling from this mortal coil, masculinity asked to be remembered for the times it was at its best. The times it thought and innovated. The times it built and created. The times it fought for noble ideas.
Meanwhile, minor earthquakes have been recorded around the world, as hundreds of millions of our forefathers simultaneously turned in their graves.